Monday, October 10, 2005

Bill O'Reilly: Homophobe

Bill O'Reilly cowardice excessive spin
And finally... Hush! Listen closely. Off there... in the distance - can
you hear it? Why, it's the delicate call of Billicus Oreillicus,
commonly known as the Flying Falafel, famous for its habit of defending
itself by turning purple, puffing up its chest to three times normal
size, and then unplugging its opponent's microphone. Hush! There it is
again... can you hear it? Wh... wha... WHAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

Surely there's no greater whiner in all of TV punditry than poor
downtrodden Bill O'Reilly. Last week he dedicated an entire segment of
his show to "the most vicious political websites in the country" - the
most vicious of which is, according to O'Reilly, the great Media Matters
<http://mediamatters.org/items/200510050003>. Bill said that Media
Matters "make[s] stuff [up] about me ... [e]very day of my life," has
"no ethics or scruples," and called them "assassins" and "zombies."

Bill then went on to claim that he'd had trouble booking guests on his
TV show because "they were afraid that Media Matters would go after
them," and announced that, "I've got to have bodyguards. I've got to
have security wherever I go. And it's because of them. ... I don't fear
them; I loathe them."

The Flying Falafel is apparently living in such fear that he's too
scared to even enter the same room as the truly terrifying Media Matters
honcho David Brock. Yes - O'Reilly has turned down repeated requests
from Media Matters to appear on his show.

Hush! There it is again.... Wh... wha... WHAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

This is the same guy who was diddling himself with a vibrator while
having phone sex with a colleague who rejected his advances. Thank Zeus
I'm a Democrat.

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